Stuff the ‘Cac likes #1

The American Revolution, a tribute:

“The AmRev (#27) officially began on April 19, 1775 with the midnight ride of Paul Revere, followed by the battle of Lexington and Concord…

Yawn. Enough. Maybe we more like the idea of the American Revolution. Like curling up on the couch for a marathon of The Revolution on the History Channel (#42 ,) or obsessing over David McCullough books.”

Ok Issy Albi, we’re gonna let you finish. But Johnny Tremain was the worst book of all time. ALL TIME!

“The point is, NESCAC students love the Northeast, and the American Revolution shaped New England to be the way it is now: awesome. There’s also something classically heroic about our founding fathers gathered in a room writing the Declaration of Independence, and debating concepts we take for granted in our government now…

Ok, enough nerding out. We all know B- Frank had a gas problem, and who wants to encounter that in a shuttered room in Philly? The point is, we love our roots, we love the Boston Tea Party, we love the liberty bell, we love Sam Adams, we love to chant “U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!”

No matter what the occasion.”

                                                -Issy Albi, Bowdoin

Ok Issy, that’s a pretty solid defense of our love of all things AmRev (not you Tremain, can it twerp!) However, we can’t help but ask what life would look like if we *gasp* hadn’t won the war. Imaaaagination…

1. We wouldn’t have this picture of Texans gleefully participating in American football courtesy of HuffPost, and we wouldn’t be reading HuffPost. At the very least it would be called Hufflepuff…

2. We wouldn’t have tried spelling Europe with a “y” yesterday, realized our mistake, and self- flagellated with a roll of toilet paper to compensate.

3. We wouldn’t have to eat here… although here is pretty good. We recommend the Cape Cod Reuben, dear.

4. We would use words like wanker, bladdered, and arse and actually know what they mean.

5. We would listen to The Smiths, and suddenly relate to the elevator scene in 500 Days of Summer on a much deeper level.

Genuinely tempting…but we have a reputation to uphold:

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