Some hippie, on golf


Well, Improper didn’t have any Stanley Cup porn blowing up their homepage this week but they did have a rather nice article about the world’s worst golf handicap– hippie parents. The author, the unfortunate result of a Tom’s deodorant wearing sperm meeting a barefoot egg, did what any smart prep con would do: cheat.

Here are some of my favorite quotes:

“I didn’t realize that I wanted to be a stuffy rich guy until I got to college, and by then it was too late. If you’re not playing golf by age six, you may as well not bother. I mean, if a finely tuned athletic specimen such as myself can’t get the hang of it, then there’s really no hope for anyone.”

“If you want to be a purist, then go walk around a field in Scotland whacking a dried sheep bladder with a piece of driftwood, which I’m pretty sure is the deranged, whiskey-induced recreational activity that spawned this dumb sport. Meanwhile, I’ll be teeing up my $3 golf balls and out-driving the guys who started playing when they were toddlers. What am I supposed to do—practice until I’m good, like some kind of foreigner? I may have been born in a bathtub, but it wasn’t yesterday.”

Read the whole article here.

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